Current mood:

uncomfortable

Inner Workings
I had a really surreal and strange dream the other night. I dreamt that I was walking north at Yonge & Eglinton at night, but of course it looked different in my dream. It was more beautiful, and the architecture was that of old buildings, covered in grey stucco. Everything looked modern and sleek in the moonlight, but still welcoming. I remember the lighting; it was bright, and directed specifically, like halogen spotlights. I was walking with someone, but then that person was gone - as can happen in a dream. I was keeping a fast pace, as I usually do, as I approached a group of guys walking in the same direction as me. It was a little intimidating because they were bigger than me, and they were pretty clearly straight and well dressed, as well as having an air of aggression to them. I passed through them on the side walk, but the leader of the group called out to me. He was wearing a hat - Louis Vuitton or something with a pattern - and I recall his suit jacket being open. Attractive, but mean looking. I don't remember exactly what he said to me, but I knew that he was demanding my wallet, or money, or whatever I had on me. Obviously this guy didn't need to steal, and that made me even more apprehensive, because he must have had some other motive. His group of about five guys surrounded me, and I thought they were just being assholes. They began pushing me around, especially when I started giving them attitude. The leader was right in my face, and it was unnerving to have a stranger swearing at me so close. I know that from there, they grabbed me, and dragged me somewhere. I realized that they had taken me to my school, which was near by. There were lots of full length windows, and it seemed like we were staying in the lobby area. I was bound somehow, and so afraid because they weren't asking me for anything any more, they were just hurting me for the sake of hurting me. The leader seemed to really hate me, and by the way he was acting I thought he might kill me, or rape me, and it was terrifying. I can recall the exact sensation of helplessness and terror. I didn't understand why he would be doing this to me, why he would want to torture me. He asked if I was afraid of snakes. At first I said "please" or something, but quickly acted as if it wouldn't bother me. I know that if he had seen the fear in my eyes it would have just encouraged him. The last thing I remember then, is being roughed up again by his group, and then I blacked out. I woke up the next day in the dream, still at the school. The police were there, and taking some reports, but I couldn't remember what had happened. Someone, a friend of mine, told me that the police had showed up and caught the guys. It was truly disturbing though, how I had no memory past the last few moments with the snake talk and the guys being violent with me again. I had never blacked out before in my life, so what could have happened to cause that now? Had they hit me too hard? Did they actually end up raping me? Nothing. The police didn't seem too interested in helping me, so I went to leave. On the way out though, I realized that everyone needed a swipe card to get into the school, and at night, you needed a special kind that was only given out on a temporary basis or something. So, the dream became the beginning of a puzzle that I had to solve. These guys didn't go to my school, but someone who did must have granted them access. I had to find out who it was, and why they would do it. At this point, I woke up for real in the middle of the night. I still held with me the fear of the nightmare. It was unsettling, as I tried to make my way back to sleep...